Will I know?

February 12, 2010 by gardengirl

I have a ton of worries in general about my pregnancy.  I'm just a worry wort by nature.  But I do have 2 of my biggest fears eating me alive!!  One of course is that I'm going to bleed to death and die leaving my husband caring for our newborn on his own the rest of his life (I am high risk and I am on blood thinners so techincially this could happen but I'm just a freak thinking about it all the time - so bad that I'm worried about my "affairs' being in order before I give birth - i need a cold beer just thinking about it...)

But more importantly, lately I've been freaking out worried about how i'll know I"m in labor.  Now I've never been pregnant before so I'm worried I won't know I'm having contractions or when my water breaks - since technically it doesn't happen like in the movies so I'm told.  I have cramps or a stomach ache or pain every day.  So how will i know it's the real deal!?  Everyone keeps telling me 'you'll know".  But will I?  I'm so nervous!!  I had cramps all night last night and the DH was just saying it's those buxton hacks or whatever (braxton hicks but at least he's read up... :) ). How do I know I"m not in labor.  OMG, I"m going to make myself nuts and need to have a chat with my doc.  I'm an hour away from the hospital and I'm terrified one day I'm going to go to the bathroom and my baby is going to start coming out, the ambulance will be too late and then biggest fear #1 I bleed to death.

Okay enough of the freaking out mode today. Just needed to get this off my chest.  Being pregnant is so stressful!!!!

Permalink