Emotional

December 9, 2009 by gardengirl

I'm super emotional today.  First of all I hate Facebook.  I'm only on it for work and I never friend people - but they friend me.  So that means every time I log in I see their stuff (even thought I hide 90% of it).  Today I saw pictures of an old friend's wedding.  I got nosey and started looking at them. By the end of it I was balling.  This friend I have known since kindergarten. We were so close growing up.  In high school I hung out with this huge group of friends.  I was dating one of the guys who I thought I was going to marry (we dated for 5 years).  But I realized he was never going to grow up and we broke up.  After that, all my friends kind of stayed with him and I was shut out.  I was never called to hang out, we lost touch, and there ya have it.  

Seeing the pictures of this friend's wedding reminded me of all that.  There he was with his new wife and all around him were my old friends.  People that stopped talking to me and people I lost touch with.  It broke my heart.  A part of me wishes I never lost touch with them and that they would try harder to keep in touch with me.  I'm so sad that now I have this very tiny group of friends and will never be a part of their crowd again.  I'm grateful for the friends I have but sad that I lost so many.

Also work is stressing me out on top of everything.  I feel like I'm being left out of things that I could really help with. Despite me telling them I want to help and I have ideas, they ignore me. SO really it's a poopy day and I'm feeling sad.  DH told me to take a break and lie down for 10 min and relax but not helping.  Venting is though so thanks :)

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